The nature of human experience can be divided into 3 categories: physical, cognitive, and emotional (whether what we denote as “spiritual experiences” can be considered a category apart, or it is a result of the unity of all 3, is up to debate, but this is out of the scope of current discussion). We classify pain from a sprained ankle and the sensation of fear, for example, as two completely distinct entities. This difference in the quality of each experience tends to create a pervasive idea that there is a separation between what we call the mind and the body. In reality, however, the two constitute a single whole for which none of the languages, that at least I know, has a good word for. It is incredibly important to understand that there is not even a possibility of disconnection, as if there were a certain relationship between the two that needs to be fixed. They are inseparable, as two faces of the same coin. The problem is that the figures of speech we use to describe the dynamics of this mindbody of ours are not good enough and they confuse us even further. To live a good life, it is necessary to address each of the 3 aforementioned categories on its appropriate level and work towards unifying them. In this text, I want to speak about the layer of emotion and obtaining emotional stability.
Imagine a final set of a high-stakes match, whether it is MMA, tennis, gymnastics, or any other sport. The tension is palpable. The athlete, facing the challenge of a formidable opponent, must navigate the internal stream of overwhelming emotions. This moment is what truly separates the champions from contenders: those who can recognize and regulate their emotions are rising to the top; those who are overplayed by their own instability are left behind. Everyone on a high-performance level has a good level of physical skill, but not everyone can use it under extreme duress. This moment is a testament to the power of emotional intelligence. The example could be made with any high-stakes situation where the margin for mistake is extremely low. It does not only extend to high-level athletes or performers. Every day in our lives we encounter situations where emotion overpowers our rationale, and the outcome can often be dramatic.
What is an emotion? To better navigate this territory it is convenient to make an attempt to unpack this question first. Despite many theories, we are very far from understanding what emotions really are. However, there are certain things that we do know and can work with. What we call emotion is a set of bodily sensations that we interpret and predict in the given context. For a long time, it was believed that there is a specific pattern for every emotion that is universal cross-culturally and amongst different layers of the population. However, researchers such as Lisa Feldman Barret have disproven the idea that there is a distinct pattern of emotions that are innate to all humans. She emphasizes that there are many factors involved in constructing an emotion, mainly individual experiences, cultural cues, and context. Interpreting bodily sensations that arise in a given situation, we put a label on it according to our personal perception, and this determines how our behavior will be affected. This process is not conscious most of the time, and the system is altered with the speed of lightning. When emotions arise, they mobilize the body. They are the agent that initiates an action and organizes physical movement. When emotions are not regulated, we have no control over our behavior!
The term emotional intelligence, coined by American psychologists Peter Salovey and John Mayer (and popularized by Daniel Goleman), refers to an individual’s ability to recognize, understand, manage, and effectively use one’s own emotions. It results in the capacity to maintain a consistent emotional state, especially during periods of high stress. The capacity to handle complicated situations without experiencing significant mood alterations is a good sign of someone with high emotional intelligence. Unchecked and extreme emotions can disrupt our ability to perform at our best; it will inevitably affect both physical movement and cognition. As in the aforementioned example of an athlete, the peak performance can only be achieved when the emotional layer is regulated. Mind you, being in control of your emotions does not mean numbing them and pushing them away, it means being able to observe the sensations that are arising in the body and not allow the stream of information to overwhelm and shut down other systems. The decisions that are made when you are controlled by emotion are never adequate and usually have negative consequences.
Connected to emotional intelligence but a slightly different concept of dynamic emotional stability extends to include adaptability and responsiveness to varying situations in real-time. It involves not only maintaining a steady emotional state but also being able to adjust and regulate emotions according to the demands of different contexts. This concept emphasizes the flexibility to navigate through a range of emotions while ensuring that these emotional fluctuations do not negatively impact one's performance.
The interplay of our emotions, cognition, and physical body creates a closed loop where one thing affects everything else. Therefore, it is not only that unregulated emotion creates a deteriorating effect in the body, but a distorted body will also create negative emotion! Moreover, both or either will have an effect on the thought process of an individual. When things get out of control on any level, it creates a downward spiral that is really hard to get out of. It means, that in order to create a real change in the system, all 3 categories have to be addressed.
You might ask: what emotions are for if they apparently generate so many problems? Emotional systems evolved to provide us with meaning and mobilize us in a certain direction. This is a mechanism for survival and procreation, inherited from our ancestors. Emotions are a stream of information that is interpreted through action. The negative or positive labels we put on it are largely a result of individual and social conditioning. Knowing that we can harness the potential of emotion and direct it. There are many strategies for developing emotional intelligence, and it is a process that will go on for a lifetime. First of all, it is important to understand that it is incredibly hard to work on emotion through thinking. Cognitive faculty, according to psychologist Johnathan Heidt, will always find a way to justify whatever the emotional faculty needs it to. He argues that the emotional and intuitive aspects of moral judgments always precede conscious reasoning and shape our decisions and views by inclining the thinking process towards the direction that has been already decided on the unconscious level. Therefore, thinking is not something that can be trusted. The focus should be on the physical practices that increase awareness of the body and the sensations it produces. The quicker the recognition of a pattern is, the bigger buffer can be created between emotion arising and it affecting the behavior. The ability to do that depends on whether you can sense the body in a refined way. This separation is crucial to developing emotional stability: observing the pattern in the body should be detached from the meaning that we automatically associate with it. Recognizing it for what it is: simply a stream of information, is the key. Understanding that not every emotion arising is appropriate for a given situation, and often just an automatic response that is dictated by prior conditioning, will create a necessary separation that will give you time to reflect on it without giving into the reflexive behavior. The capacity to regulate response to arising emotion is a sign of maturity.
Understanding the interplay between our emotions, cognition, and physical movement, is crucial for a comprehensive understanding of what it means to be a human. For this, we must develop a better relationship with our bodies. Learn to not treat it like a container for some ephemeral “spirit” that produces thought and emotion and thus has a higher place in the hierarchy, but as a sit and unifying layer of the Self, the integral part of who we are. Regulating emotions is only possible when we pay more attention to the body and engage regularly in thoughtful physical practices. In the words of Ido Portal: "As we sense more and deeper, we become more”. Particularly more measured, more calm, and more open to becoming someone bigger than we currently are.